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Two surgeries followed by two years of chemo (immunotherapy) and the long months of steroids that followed to treat the side effects of immunotherapy have been brutal on this body.
I was feeling particularly irritated about the shifting shape of my body when I was caught off guard while listening to the words to a song I dearly love and consider my personal life's philosophy.
"Your Song"
by Jenny Phillips
He put a light inside you, to remind you, you're a part of His plan.
You may not see, what he's shaping you to be, by the power of His hand...
He has written beautiful things in your life.
You're a masterpiece in His eyes!
There is a song inside you...
He wrote a melody only you can sing
He's leading you by faith to find your voice
So sing it strong... He's seen it all along
It's YOUR song!
You have His love to guide you. You carry a purpose divine.
He draws you near and the music that you hear
Whispers of your Heavenly design
He has blessed you and given you so many gifts,
You're an instrument for Him.
(repeat chorus)
He has written beautiful things in your life.
You're a masterpiece in His eyes!
There is a song inside you...
He wrote a melody only you can sing
He's leading you by faith to find your voice
So sing it strong... He's seen it all along
It's YOUR song!
You have His love to guide you. You carry a purpose divine.
He draws you near and the music that you hear
Whispers of your Heavenly design
He has blessed you and given you so many gifts,
You're an instrument for Him.
(repeat chorus)
I guess if the inside is changing I need to accept the outside changing too. I LOVE the way Heavenly Father has shaped my spirit and even though my physical body doesn't "fit" anymore, I humbly accept God's will for me. I trust that He sees his "masterpiece" as it can be in the eternities and am faithfully willing to put my hand in His to continue learning "my" melody.
Chagrinned, I quickly sighed and resigned myself to the trust and peace that have attended me this whole time. My husband, family and friends don't seem to mind that I look like a chipmunk... or an apple on two sticks. Children are notoriously honest and my grandchildren seem to love me no matter what ... so I'm good. And as my sister Raquel said, "At least you can laugh about it!" and yes, I can.
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OH WELL!!!
Gonna wash the dust off my soul, gonna listen to some rock and roll,
no cares, come what may, I'm makin' a beautiful day...
Gonna drive my car to the sea...
Swim out far as I believe that waves will wash the grey away.
I'm makin' a beautiful day!
"Beautiful Day" by Joshua Radin
