Perspective

The congregational chorister was swinging her arm back and forth so enthusiastically she nearly knocked the hymnbook out of her left hand. As a visitor, I struggled not to draw attention to myself by laughing at the dear young woman scrambling to get the hymnbook settled back down again. My daughter leaned over and whispered, "She's handicapped. Isn't she darling?"

https://www.instagram.com/p/uoFsA_KgN3/?taken-by=bharding15

Suddenly, my perspective changed and I saw her in a whole different light. Same young woman, same enthusiastic swinging arm, and yet I could really SEE her. My focus had changed. I had admired her exuberance until she accidentally lost control of the hymnbook and I thought to myself that she should lead more carefully. I humbly realized that she WAS leading the music most carefully and as well as she possibly could.

As so often happens, the Lord allowed me to learn the principle of perspective again, quite soon. I was helping a friend take her elderly parents to a government office appointment early one morning. When we opened the door to their shared apartment in a local assisted living center they were both asleep. Oh boy, this was going to be a little more complicated than we thought. As I quickly glanced at the framed family photos on the bookcase in their room, I had a rapid overview of their lives and the things they cherished. How far they had come! From being leaders in their home, church and community to at last, everything fitting in a single bookcase.

My friend introduced me to them but because of dementia they had forgotten in seconds who I was as I tried to help them without infringing on their privacy. They cheerfully got dressed to go without argument and I was touched at their innocent acceptance of a stranger's help. The kitchen staff got them a quick breakfast ready asking, "Do they want the usual?" and we were off. After getting all arranged and buckled in, her mother softly said a prayer before taking a bite. My friend and I exchanged a knowing glance over the seats and said nothing out loud, but so much with our eyes. This was the heritage she came from and we both knew the meaning of her simple but heartfelt prayer. So many things forgotten but not this...

Fortunately, we were able to park right in front of the huge municipal building and I was so glad I was there to help get two elderly parents, one with a cane and one in a wheelchair, through the tight security with the least amount of confusion. We waited our turn with reassurances repeated to them every so often. Her father was quiet, napping off and on, keeping his newspaper carefully folded on his lap; but her mother would ask about the "doctor" we were seeing and make comments like, "I haven't been to this office before."  My friend repeatedly told them in as simple terms as she could what we were doing that morning. Finally, their number was called and through much maneuvering we were able to finally seat them where they could see and be seen at the help window. My friend began to explain what she needed and some lengthy discussion followed. Her parents were being exceptionally patient and compliant but eventually her mother, getting a little annoyed at how long it was taking, asked loudly, "Does he know everything about us there is to know now?"

Family photo

Her father, with head bowed, so quiet through the whole event, slowly reached out his hand to her, which she then tenderly clasped with the hand not resting on her cane. They stayed that way until all the forms were completed and we were able to make our slow but steady way back to the car with huge sighs of relief.

Earlier I had felt to mourn their loss, but after spending the morning with them, my perspective had changed. Nothing of great importance had been lost. They still had each other and the love a lifetime of relationships can bring. They look forward to having the same breakfast they always have without even remembering that it's the same breakfast they always have! Focusing on the present, every day is a new day for them. No loss, just lucky indeed!