Doubting Our Doubts

Family Photo

This week my lovely daughter in law was awarded the Workplace Hero Award for her excellent work ethic, great attitude and significant contributions to her department. Co-workers and the division head said THE nicest things about her! They obviously loved her and appreciated the very things we do about her!

I could not have been more proud of her and couldn't keep the tears from flowing! Her beauty and strength shown through in every frame and her words filled me with encouragement and hope.

I'm so grateful for her determination and diligence, two wonderful qualities I wish I had more abundantly. As wonderful as it was to see that, her next words gave me even more admiration for her. I told her that she should post it to Facebook and I would "like" it. She said that Facebook has become very difficult for her lately as some of her closest friends are angrily expressing views that are directly contrary to hers and it makes her sad and uncomfortable to see it. She then expressed her testimony about marriage being between one man and one woman, making me even more proud of her and reconfirming my testimony as well.

I hadn't been on Facebook for a few days and logged on to see what she was talking about. One of the very first posts in my newsfeed was of a dear friend announcing that she was so disappointed in the latest announcement from the church insulting children of gay couples not being allowed to be blessed or baptized until they were 18, that even though she knew it would hurt people close to her who loved the Mormon church, she was publicly announcing that she was an apostate. Insulting children? The church? I doubted that could be true. It didn't make sense that a church so thoroughly Christian that it has the name of Jesus Christ in it's title, would insult children? I doubted my doubts and read further...

In a clarification from the First Presidency it very clearly states that it does NOT AFFECT those who are already baptized and active, NOR WILL IT AFFECT those who have one gay parent but don't live with them, AND each situation will be examined on the basis of what is the most beneficial for each child. 
"Our concern with respect to children is their current and future well-being and the harmony of their home environment....[this change will] apply only to those children whose primary residence is with a couple living in a same-gender marriage or similar relationship. When a child living with such a same-gender couple has already been baptized and is actively participating in the Church, provisions of Section 16.13 do not require that his or her membership activities or priesthood privileges be curtailed or that further ordinances be withheld."

read full text here

I can only imagine what had influenced my dear friend to reach this point, I don't know and I certainly can't judge. If you read the New Testament you can see how Jesus loved all people.... truly loved them and didn't condemn them. As he told the woman taken in adultery, "Go thy way and sin no more." He acknowledged she had sinned. SHE HAD SINNED! Well, so have I sinned! I am no better than anyone else on this planet and have no reason to judge or condemn either. I thought of all my sins and how beyond grateful I am for the Atonement, and that I KNOW because of it our family can be together forever if we keep our covenants, a thought I CLING to... especially lately. I also KNOW without a doubt that the Book of Mormon is true, I have read it many times and each time become more convinced of its truth... and how SO MANY truths follow THAT knowledge.

A friend sent me a link to a blog and I loved what she so beautifully said a few weeks ago about being true to what we KNOW before we are true to our doubts and to always keep our covenants. Here is a quote from her blog I totally love:

Oh, how Satan would love to cause us to stumble over things like seer stones, marriage, gender identity, polygamy, etc. And sadly, he’s having encouraging success with some closest to us.

Another question things of late cause me to ask: Is faith an endurance exercise? After all, we are encouraged to “endure to the end.” What does that mean? I think it means that under all circumstances we keep our covenants. I think it means that the Lord expects us to remain faithful even when we have doubts and questions. But faithful to what? ... faithful to what we do know, and have developed our testimony upon...

The marvelous thing about gaining a testimony of Jesus Christ and that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is His Church here upon the earth today is in how we obtain that testimony – it can be stellar because properly obtained it comes not of man but from God Himself. 

http://wellbehavedmormonwoman.blogspot.com/2015/08/the-seer-stone-faithful-membership-not.html

Keep Paddling

KEEP PADDLING

A series of four framed prints painted by the late Thomas Cole in 1842 entitled "The Voyage of Life" hang in our home. The paintings depict an allegory of the four stages of human life: infancy, youth, manhood, and old age. In these paintings a voyager travels in a canoe on the River of Life.

Wikipedia

He begins his journey in infancy on a calm river with lush green surroundings accompanied by an angel. 

Wikipedia

As a youth, the river bends and turns with adventure and a magnificent castle in the sky. The angel is looking on. 

Wikipedia

As a man, the voyager looks up praying as he helplessly goes through the treacherous rapids with the angel watching from afar. The last painting depicts an old man in a worn and weathered canoe, being led upward toward heavenly light by the guardian angel who has been present since the voyage began.

abcgallery.com

Two weeks ago my wife and I paddled with our son and his family through the Boundary Water Lakes of Northern Minnesota. They are pristine and beautiful, just like they have been for eons of time. These lakes border Canada and are numbered in the thousands. In our small canoes we crossed several wilderness lakes and streams, paddling stroke after stroke. At times with the winds in front of us, it seemed that we were going nowhere. When the winds shifted to our sides, waves rocked the little canoes almost to a tipping point. Our grandsons sat trustingly in the center of the boats while we paddled. The journey was exhausting yet wonderful. It was worth it!

Bearskin Lake

In a way, we are all voyagers on the River of Life, paddling one stroke at time, with angels looking on. Faith, hope, trust and gratitude are only a few of the things we experience and rely on as we paddle away. Who can doubt the trust and faith of the young infant born into a family to be loved, fed, clothed, taught and protected. They are an heritage of the Lord and rely on loving parents and others to paddle for them. The youth have hope for bigger and better, energy for exploration and adventure. Those in the middle years of the voyage are sometimes just holding on as they pray to the Lord and trust in Him to make it through life's rough waters. As we near the end of our journey our gratitude unto the Lord swells within us as we come to a realization of how dependent we are on Him.

Alma speaking to his son Helaman said, "O my son Helaman, behold, thou art in thy youth, and therefore, I beseech of thee that thou wilt hear my words and learn of me; for I do know that whosoever shall put their trust in God shall be supported in their trials, and their troubles, and their afflictions, and shall be lifted up at the last day" (Alma 36:3).

Nephi tells us, " Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eternal life" (2 Nephi 31:20).

Portaging

Challenges will continue throughout our journey. Our arms may tire as we steadfastly paddle through life's turbulent waters. If we remember to feast upon the word of Christ we will learn His doctrine. It will brighten our hope, replenish our strength and increase our determination to endure. May we 'keep paddling' to the best of our ability and submissively trust in Him whose Atonement is all encompassing.

Michael L. Beus, Farmington North Stake Presidency