Vanity or Sanity?

The oncologist called the lump in my neck the equivalent of a canary in a coal mine. Evidence that things were not going well. What was the size of a pea a month ago was now the size of a grape. My right shoulder and arm were hurting the exact same way they were when a tumor had taken over my vertebrae requiring surgery, which I did NOT want to endure again. The increasing pain had caused me to give in to ever increasing pain meds. We knew the scans weren't going to be good and honestly thought we might have reached the point where nothing but pain management was an option. 

Instagram: Quote by Robert D. Hales

As we had suspected, tumors new and old were growing rapidly. Tumors that were millimeters were now centimeters. Imagine my surprise when the doctor suggested chemotherapy as a way to manage the pain. That didn't make sense to me?

"Why now and not in June?" I asked. 

"Because your tumors were stable in June and you still had good quality of life."

"What if I still don't want to do chemotherapy?"

"Well, the tumors in your liver are going to inhibit your ability to handle the toxins in your blood and you will turn yellow, be out of it, and possibly combative. It's fine for you, because you're out of it, but it's extremely difficult for the caregivers and I would want to put that off as long as possible. Of course, it is your choice but I will insist that you at least do radiation on the tumor on your adrenal gland. That is going to be very painful if you don't do something."

Instagram

Now what... 

My sweet husband was not going to insist that I do chemotherapy but he was oh so hopeful that I would at least try. Dr. Grossman had assured me I would only have a few bad days and feel mostly good between the 3 week treatments. 

Don't believe anyone who tells you this.  

One of the things I have been most worried about is scaring my grandchildren with my appearance. Yellow and bald... All I can think is that my new nickname will be "minion..." 

I talked to my niece who had gone through chemotherapy wearing a polar ice cap and was able to keep her hair. She was encouraging and made it seem like a reasonable effort to make. We went to the temple and I felt peace about at least trying. 

We rented the caps and bought 50 pounds of dry ice. https://penguincoldcaps.com We took two large coolers with the four gel caps, the headbands, the velcro straps, the thermometer that allowed us to keep the caps at -22 F, an electric blanket to keep me warm and the leather gloves required to handle the ice. My husband, daughter Kate and sister Megan changed the caps every 20 minutes for the next 12 HOURS! Such selfless angels. I can't even begin to thank them enough. 

My husband, who I believe truly WILL love my yellow and bald head, was especially reluctant about this intense effort to keep my hair. He kept muttering, "Vanity... I'll love you no matter how you look."  I kept countering with, "NOT vanity... it's my SANITY we're talking about here. If I lose my hair, then I lose it and it wasn't meant to be but THANK you for trying with me."

One good thing about having a physician for a husband is they know their way around a medical institution's jargon. One bad thing about having a physician for a husband is the nurses assume you know the same things your husband knows. And you don't. There were things I definitely didn't know when we went home.

I woke up the morning after the chemo feeling fabulous! I cleaned house, did the dishes and washed clothes! I was ready to take on projects! My burst of energy was very short-lived.

My husband had come home early to take care of me and after his first declaration of love and gratitude that I am still here with him, observed that I was having an allergic reaction to the chemo and immediately put me on allergy medication. 

What??? Noooo!!! 

From that point on, I basically slept the days away. Totally exhausted and constantly nauseous, I didn't even leave my room for the next three days. I didn't/couldn't respond to my phone and barely surfaced when family came to visit. My sweet daughter made us dinner and stroked my hair during the LDS Church Devotional while I tried to keep food down.

What do we learn from the experiences life brings us? What we want to take in, I suppose. I wish the world to know of my testimony of the Savior. I have no where else to turn. He is my EVERYTHING. I'm putting ALL my faith and hope in Him. When I feel torn apart by the disaster coming, I cling to the knowledge that the Savior has experienced EVERYTHING I will. For LOVE! He is the light of the world, GIVEN for us!

Yesterday I spent the whole morning listening to one Christmas song after another in praise of this season of Nativity. I wondered what the word "Noel" means? From the earliest known English and French carols using the word it has meant the good news of the nativity! When we sing NOEL we wish the world to know of the good news of the Savior's birth, life, and incomprehensible miracle of the resurrection, literally lifting us ALL from the grave.

Christ, the everlasting Lord will reign forever more. I hope to be in that audience, on my knees, filled with the joy of success in overcoming this earthly trial. I don't know how much longer or how much more I will need to endure, but I say unto you, "NOEL!"

Click here to listen to "Noel" by Lauren Diagle

I have faith and hope and pray for charity that my circle of life may be complete. I pray for all of us that we may find peace in the trust we can have in His Atonement and redeeming love. I say these things, in His name, amen.

Live It To Share It

Elder Robert D. Hales - a Tribute

“We can share the gospel only to the extent we live it.”

This quote embodies my whole desire in writing this blog. That I can express my testimony as I live it, now with a terminal illness as the driving force, it is very compelling to share the beliefs that ground me and lift me at the same time. 

This is a family photo of me with Steven C. Hales on Halloween in 1958. I was a tiger and he was a ghost. We didn't like our masks. 

Our parents were close friends before we were born, getting their college education at the University of Utah in Salt Lake City and later living near each other in Boston as they furthered their professional careers through additional education. 

Photo: lds.org

Even though the above photo is the only memory I have of being together Boston, we became friends through the years of their many moves around the world because of the effort they made to stop and visit us whenever they came through Utah.

Family Photo

I remember Steve bringing his brother, David, and friend, George, to ski with us and how well he handled the steep slopes here in Utah. Because he had lived all over the world, I was always grateful to hear his perspective from the "mission field" and it helped my testimony grow as we shared time together at BYU. 

One of those trips to Utah was because his father had been called to the First Quorum of the Seventy, then Presiding Bishop of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and then later as an Apostle, serving in the Quorum of the Twelve. I'm so grateful that God has placed those kind of friends in my life and when Mike and I were trying to decide where to practice medicine, my parents happened to be getting together with the Hales and we heard some great advice, which later became Elder Hales's conference address, "Making Decisions at the Crossroads of Life" given in October of 1988. Click here to read full address

His wife, Mary, is the perfect example of a righteous woman in every way. One time someone asked her, "What is it like to be married to an apostle?" Her reassuring and encouraging answer has stayed with me, "Well, he wasn't an apostle when I married him."

He continued to give us good advice as I navigated those early parenting years. This is an excerpt from a favorite talk of his:

"I join with faithful parents everywhere in declaring that we know who we are, we understand our responsibilities as parents, and we do not fear the wrath of the prince of darkness. We trust in the light of the Lord.

Like Jochebed, (Moses's mother) we raise our families in a wicked and hostile world—a world as dangerous as the courts of Egypt ruled by Pharaoh. But, like Jochebed, we also weave around our children a protective basket—a vessel called “the family”—and guide them to safe places where our teachings can be reinforced in the home and at church.

Ultimately, we guide them to the greatest of all houses of learning—the holy temple, where one day they can kneel, surrounded by their faithful family members, to be sealed for time and all eternity to a worthy companion. What they learned from us, they will teach their children, and the work of eternal families will go on.

Along the way, at times when our children are away from us, the Lord provides inspired “Miriams” to watch over them—special third-party helpers such as priesthood and auxiliary leaders, teachers, extended family, and worthy friends. Sometimes the Spirit prompts us as parents to seek special help beyond ourselves through such resources as doctors and qualified counselors. The Spirit will direct when and how such help should be obtained.

But the greatest help for our families comes through the gospel—from our Heavenly Father, through the guidance of the Holy Ghost, in the doctrines and principles, and through the priesthood.
To read the whole talk click here.

When my Dad passed away in April of 2009, Elder Hales spoke at his funeral about families and the eternal love we can share with them and our friends. Such a comforting doctrine as I face this time of separation from them. 

He reminded us of the promises in Alma 40-42, that the Resurrection will restore our bodies to their perfect state. That is good for me to remember every time I look in the mirror, too. ;)










It was a bittersweet moment when I walked into Seminary and saw his picture missing from the wall of apostles. His wisdom had been a guide for so many years and I enjoyed reading his quotes and talks again. He faced painful health challenges that caused him to express this great thought.

"I learned that constant, intense pain is a great consecrating purifier that humbles us and draws us closer to God’s Spirit.”³³













In spite of having cancer for four years, it has just been since February that I have faced constant, intense pain-- taking all your focus to what you can do to get through the next hour, or minute sometimes. I loved reading that quote from him then realizing that the Savior knows what it feels like too, and can comfort me in the ways that I need.

The week Elder Hales passed away, we took four of our children through the Latter Day Saint temple on Oahu, Hawaii where the flag was flown at half mast to honor him and the marvelous life he led. I will always remember coming home from that joyous experience and then watching his funeral, filled with gratitude that he had been such a big part of my spiritual growth and maturation. 

See the beautiful tribute the church made for him at this link:

Remembering the life of Robert D. Hales

"This is the call of Christ to every Christian today: 'Feed my lambs... Feed my sheep' - share my gospel with young and old, lifting, blessing, comforting, encouraging, and building them, especially those who think and believe differently than we do," he taught.
Regarding those who "want us to come down off the high ground and join them in a theological scrum in the mud," Elder Hales counseled Latter-day Saints to respond with their testimonies and to stand with the Savior.
"We show forth His love, which is the only power that can subdue the adversary and answer our accusers without accusing them in return. That is not weakness. That is Christian courage."

Just as the Savior was "despised and rejected of men" (Isaiah 53:3; Mosiah 14:3), Latter-day Saints may also experience misunderstanding, criticism, and false accusation. "It is our sacred privilege to stand with Him!"

Another excerpt I love on the topic of "prayer" by Elder Hales:

Though we may not know when or how our prayers will be answered, Elder Hales testified, answers will come in the Lord’s own way and according to His timetable. “For some answers we may have to wait until the hereafter. . . . Let us not give up on the Lord. His blessings are eternal, not temporary.”³⁶


"In my life I have learned that sometimes I do not receive an answer to a prayer because the Lord knows I am not ready. When he does answer it, it is often "here a little and there a little" because that is all I can bear or all I am willing to do. Too often we pray for patience, but we want it right now."

Moses counseled, “And thou shalt teach [these words] diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.”8 Our families should be in our thoughts continually.

I bear my special witness that Jesus Christ gave His life, making possible the salvation and exaltation of all the families of the earth. With all the feeling of a tender parent, I express my love and the love of our Heavenly Father to you and your family.

This is a good reminder for me at this point in my life as I face yet another challenge. Chemotherapy, with all its undesirable side effects, is my only option to slow the growth and relieve pain. I need to "know whether to fight, flee, or go with the flow of my unfolding circumstances."




I'm posting some of my favorite quotes from Elder Hales I found on Instagram. Each a gem of wisdom that has meaning for me as I navigate this cancer journey.

And last but not least... his final words that inspire me to have faith that I may stand in His presence in some not very far off day.

Labor and Delivery Pending

If you've ever had a baby you know what I'm talking about. You're in the last trimester and it suddenly dawns on you, there is no way to turn back and not finish this. You HAVE to deliver this baby, somehow. The blessing is that the closer you get to the due date the more ready you become. Your pain and discomfort become the motivation to go through whatever you have to, to finally bring your baby into the world and have joy!

This analogy came to me as a sort of epiphany: I'm "pregnant" with melanoma. I have tumors growing everywhere and there is NO WAY out of this ending. Right now I'm not in a lot of discomfort, other than the usual aches and pains that come with old age, but the tumors will continue to grow until one affects a necessary body system. The pain and discomfort will bring about the readiness to deliver "myself" into heaven and it will be my turn to enter the Spirit World.

I'm just praying for a short labor...

Our Love

Where do you start when something like this happens? You start by remembering and recording tender mercies that remind you that God has been there all along. The day of my first surgery we were in the pre-op room and three different nurses had tried and not succeeded in putting in an IV line. They gave up and let the surgeon put it in when I was under anesthesia and it wouldn't hurt, or at least I wouldn't feel it. 

When they left, Mike took my hand to comfort me and suddenly there was a soft strain of music floating through the room. Paul Cardall's "Remember Our Love" (click here to listen) inexplicably began playing from his backpack sitting untouched on the floor. It has become our theme song and never fails to pull me back to feeling faith and peace about everything. We planned a trip then and finding it very therapeutic to retreat to regroup, have continued this practice each time we receive disappointing news.

RollerCoaster or Tower of Terror?

When I expressed what a four year roller coaster this journey has been my sweet husband said, "Well, at least it hasn't been a sudden fall and we have had some hopeful ups as well as disappointing downs. I feel very blessed to have been given really good time since your first diagnosis. I don't know any stage four melanoma patients that have lived this long. I think we need to list the "Facts" from the appointment before we start speculating or go off on tangents." So he listed and I made notes:

Facts

The melanoma is growing in multiple places now (I added that it is not threatening any body systems at this time but he didn't consider that a 'fact' because we only scanned my torso and we don't know what is happening in my brain.)

There is no way to stop the melanoma. Side effects of Pembro are too severe. Pembro was good while it lasted but it's usefulness has ended. It will take a significant time to get over the side effects of Pembro.

Over the next year chemotherapy could possibly reduce some suffering but will not extend life expectancy. Chemotherapy has side effects that cause suffering and decreases quality of life. The benefits of chemotherapy do not appear to outweigh the side effects.

Quality of life right now is good and a decision to not proceed with chemotherapy was made today. Recommendations from the doctors were to "live it up" and enjoy the summer, which we plan to do, and we will scan again in August.

This time, as in the two previous bad news appointments, we traveled to Oregon. We headed off that weekend without a sure plan of exactly where we were going but of course, God guided us to a beach house on the Oregon coast where the peaceful waves soothed our raw nerves and restored the peace we needed. My husband is very calm and reassuring, in spite of his own anguish at losing me to such an insidious terminal illness. Being a physician and yet not able to do one thing to prevent this cancer from taking over my body has been devastating for him. 

Someone listening to our conversations would be surprised at our morbid humor but it helps. He started listing all the things I won't have to deal with and with each one we laughed harder and harder, releasing all the pent up stress and anxiety. 

  

"Just think babe, you won't ever get old or wrinkled, er.. more wrinkles! ... You don't need to wear sunscreen!  ... You'll never have another kind of cancer! You were so worried about a slow death from Multiple Sclerosis complications and now you don't have to worry about that! ... No more fear of flying! You'll never be a widow! You'll never have Alzheimers! 

No more Mammograms or Colonoscopies

Joint replacements just aren't in your future. 

Neither are Cataracts or 

Macular Degeneration

Bunions

Toe fungus

...

You don't have to worry about the triple H:

Hyperactive Bladder

Hearing Aids

Heart Attacks

...

You'll never have the four Ds: diabetes, dementia, dentures and depends!

Then I added "You mean the five Ds, you forgot depilatories!"

Then he said, "What are depilatories?" (He actually said "delipatories?" :)

And last of all.... you won't have to worry about the Apocalypse... or another Election, whichever comes first.

Photo Credits: Hannah Beus Van Bibber

He is perfect for me. I don't know what I would do without him. Because I don't know if I'll be here on our 40th anniversary this December, I'm going to just take a minute to sing his praises now. 

I have always been a very fortunate woman and a most blessed wife. He completes me in every way and I love him with all my heart. A blessing I received at 16 years of age was fulfilled when I met and married a "choice young man who would want to care for me all the days of my life." He has demonstrated for 39 and a half years that he WANTS to take care of me. Anything I've ever been interested in or wanted to accomplish he has tried to facilitate. He has always expressed love and gratitude for me and valued my contribution to our family. He has cherished our children and provided everything we could ever need and more. Lately, I've been a very expensive liability to him but he's never once complained, just repeatedly said, "As long as you're alive, I'm happy." Now that our mortal life together will come to an end all too soon, knowing that we will be together eternally means everything.

Babies - just the beginning...

Mike brought these "Alive" vitamins home and asked me to start taking them with my daily handful, haha! So completely focused on extending my life. Love him!

Walking on the soft sand in the shallow waves, feeling led and watched over by God in every step of this cancer journey was comforting. I loved feeling the earthly pleasures of the wind on my face and the sand between my toes. I don't know what comes next but I know that God will "manage the messiness" and as my good friend, Karen Talbot, says, "I will face it with angels on every side. 

What could be better than that?"

A Disciple's Tapestry

The day I finished reading the last talk from April 2017 General Conference I felt sad that it was over. 

PC: Lauri Pratt mudlakegirl@gmail.com

My overall sense was that I needed to know Jesus Christ. My visiting teacher made me a card I taped to the fridge that daily reminded me of this goal. Since I have been on this cancer journey I have desired to learn what I am supposed to learn and become what I am supposed to become. I have felt led and prompted many times along the way, wondering what each different treatment and experience could teach me about my Savior and His Atonement. 


My feelings have not changed. I want the same thing... always: to be a disciple of Christ. "Disciples live so that the characteristics of Christ are woven into the fiber of their beings, as into a spiritual tapestry." (See Elder Robert D. Hales talk notes below) I want my light to cling to His light. I want my virtue to cling to His virtue. I feel as Peter did when Christ, after a sermon of a difficult doctrine to understand that caused many to turn away from Him, asked the twelve if they would also go away?  



Peter said, 

"Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. And we believe and are sure that thou art that Christ, the Son of the living God."

PC: Lauri Pratt mudlakegirl@gmail.com

I, too, am sure. I want to continue to try to be a faithful disciple of Christ every day of my life. This is a short compilation of my notes of April 2017 General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day-Saints. 

Elder Eyring - Sat am
Though earthly families are far from perfect, they give God’s children the best chance to be welcomed to the world with the only love on earth that comes close to what we felt in heaven—parental love. 

Joseph Brough 

My prayer is that each of you will recognize in your experiences that Heavenly Father is leading, guiding, and walking beside you and, with that knowledge, you will proceed with confidence, knowing you are never really alone.

To lead youth requires being with them. Devoted time is an expression of love that allows us to teach by word and example.

Second, to truly guide youth, we must connect them with heaven. The time always comes when each must stand alone. Only Heavenly Father can be there to guide at all times and in all places. Our youth must know how to seek Heavenly Father’s guidance.

Elder Weatherford T Clayton-

Know that birth and death are actually just milestones on our journey to eternal life with our Heavenly Father.1They are essential parts of our Father’s plan—sacred moments when mortality and heaven intersect.

Elder Dale Renlund:

The Savior’s compassion in the face of our imperfections draws us toward Him and motivates us in our repeated struggles to repent and emulate Him. 

Ulysses Soares

Brothers and sisters, please consider the importance of the invitation King Limhi gave to his people and its relevance to us. He said, “Lift up your heads, and rejoice, and put your trust in God.” With these words, Limhi invited his people to look to the future through the eyes of faith; to replace their fears with the optimism of hope born of faith; and to not waver in placing their trust in God regardless of circumstance.

If we are steadfast and do not waver in our faith, the Lord will increase our capacity to raise ourselves above the challenges of life. We will be enabled to subdue negative impulses, and we will develop the capacity to overcome even what appear to be overwhelming obstacles. 

Elder Mark A Bragg

We are children of God. Receiving light, continuing in God, and receiving more light are what we are created to do. From the very beginning, we followed the light; we followed our Heavenly Father and His plan. Seeking the light is in our spiritual DNA....May we see the Light of Christ in others constantly and help them see it in themselves.

Elder Nelson 

True disciples of Jesus Christ are willing to stand out, speak up, and be different from the people of the world. 

When you reach up for the Lord’s power in your life with the same intensity that a drowning person has when grasping and gasping for air, power from Jesus Christ will be yours. When the Savior knows you truly want to reach up to Him—when He can feel that the greatest desire of your heart is to draw His power into your life—you will be led by the Holy Ghost to know exactly what you should do.21
When you spiritually stretch beyond anything you have ever done before, then His power will flow into you.22

Elder Robert D Hales

Many people hear the word disciple and think it means only “follower.” But genuine discipleship is a state of being. This suggests more than studying and applying a list of individual attributes. Disciples live so that the characteristics of Christ are woven into the fiber of their beings, as into a spiritual tapestry.

“If ye will have faith in me,” the Lord promised, “ye shall have power to do whatsoever thing is expedient in me.”

Knowledge is personal testimony, born from personal experience. It is knowledge that transforms us so that our “light cleaveth unto [His] light” and our “virtue loveth [His] virtue.”12 By our virtuous living, we make the journey from “I believe” to the glorious destination of “I know.”

Elder Jeffery Holland

I testify that this is His restored Church and is the vehicle for bringing the teachings and saving ordinances of His gospel to all humankind. When His message “has penetrated every continent [and] visited every clime,”15 Jesus will indeed “[show] his smiling face.”16 There will be plenty of eternal sunshine for the soul that day. For this promised hour to come, I longingly pray in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Elder Gary B Sabin

When we are complacent with our covenants, we are complicit with the consequences. 

We "stand up inside" when we wait patiently upon the Lord to remove or give us strength to endure our thorns in the flesh.16 Such thorns may be disease, disability, mental illness, death of a loved one, and so many other issues.

Gratefully, we know how it ends for the faithful. When we are “all in,” we have the all-encompassing assurance that “all things work together for good to them that love God.”26 As Elder Neal A. Maxwell said, “Don’t fear, just live right.”27

Brothers and sisters, no one has sinned tomorrow.

Elder Valeri V Cordon

If our youth cannot fast two meals, cannot study the scriptures regularly, and cannot turn off the TV during a big game on Sunday, will they have the spiritual self-discipline to resist the powerful temptations of today’s challenging world, including the temptation of pornography?

Just as a mother is compassionate with her little children, our Heavenly Father is patient with our imperfections and mistakes. He treasures and understands our feeblest utterances, mumbled in sincerity, as if they were fine poetry. He rejoices at the sound of our first gospel words. He teaches us with perfect love.

No achievement in this life, important as it may be, will be relevant if we lose the language of the gospel in our families.18

Elder Neil L Anderson

Overcoming the world is not one defining moment in a lifetime, but a lifetime of moments that define an eternity.

Elder M Russell Ballard

I testify there is no greater goal in mortality than to live eternally with our Heavenly Parents and our beloved Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. But it is more than just our goal—it is also Their goal. They have a perfect love for us, more powerful than we can even begin to comprehend. They are totally, completely, eternally aligned with us. We are Their work. Our glory is Their glory. More than anything else, They want us to come home—to return and receive eternal happiness in Their presence.

Pres Thomas S Monson

Let us examine our lives and determine to follow the Savior’s example by being kind, loving, and charitable. And as we do so, we will be in a better position to call down the powers of heaven for ourselves, for our families, and for our fellow travelers in this sometimes difficult journey back to our heavenly home. 

Elder David a Bednar

In our homes and at church, we should give balanced emphasis to all three elements of the Lord’s pattern of preparation and progression for faithful sons of God: priesthood, temple, mission. All three require us to love being and remaining worthy. Be worthy. Stay worthy.

Elder Gerald Caussee

Too often we try to entertain our young men and relegate them to a spectator role, when their faith and love for the gospel can be best developed by magnifying their priesthood. By actively participating in the work of salvation, they will be connected with heaven and they will gain awareness of their divine potential.

Pres Dieter F Uchtdorf

What is the most important calling in the Church? It is the one you currently have. No matter how humble or prominent it may seem to be, the calling you have right now is the one that will allow you not only to lift others but also to become the man of God you were created to be.

Elder Henry B Eyring

As soon as we accept the Lord’s invitation “Walk with me,” the nature of our priesthood service changes. It becomes all at once higher and nobler but also more achievable, because we know that we are not alone. D&C 84:88

You need never feel that you are too small or too insignificant for Him to take notice of you and the service you are giving in His name. The Lord’s work is not just to solve problems; it is to build people.

Remember that God’s work and glory is not simply to run an effective organization; it is “to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man” (Moses 1:39). This is, after all, why He gives His priesthood authority to flawed mortals like you and me and invites us to participate in His work. Our progress is His work!

I testify that we come to know Him best by working with Him and serving Him in the great work of bringing salvation to God’s children. 

Pres Thomas S Monson

I implore each of us to prayerfully study and ponder the Book of Mormon each day. As we do so, we will be in a position to hear the voice of the Spirit, to resist temptation, to overcome doubt and fear, and to receive heaven’s help in our lives.

Sister Joy D Jones

Brothers and sisters, hold your little ones close—so close that they see your daily religious behavior and watch you keeping your promises and covenants. “Children are great imitators, so give them something great to imitate.”21 We are indeed helping to teach and raise a sin-resistant generation unto the Lord promise by promise and covenant by covenant.

Yoon Hwan Choi

As we pray and study the scriptures every day and partake sincerely of the sacrament every week, we gain the strength to always look up to Him. 

L Whitney Clayton

Those who are deliberate about doing the “small and simple things”7—obeying in seemingly little ways—are blessed with faith and strength that go far beyond the actual acts of obedience themselves and, in fact, may seem totally unrelated to them. It may seem hard to draw a connection between the basic daily acts of obedience and solutions to the big, complicated problems we face. But they are related. In my experience, getting the little daily habits of faith right is the single best way to fortify ourselves against the troubles of life, whatever they may be.

Elder Dallin H Oaks

 It is not even enough for us to be convinced of the gospel; we must act and think so that we are converted by it. In contrast to the institutions of the world, which teach us to know something, the plan of salvation and the gospel of Jesus Christ challenge us to become something.

President Dieter F Uchtdorf 

People who are fearful may say and do the right things, but they do not feel the right things. They often feel helpless and resentful, even angry. Over time these feelings lead to mistrust, defiance, even rebellion.

Perfect love casteth out fear. 

Brothers and sisters, dear friends, God knows you perfectly. He loves you perfectly. He knows what your future holds. He wants you to “be not afraid, only believe”23 and “abide in his [perfect] love.”2

D Todd Christofferson

Do not abandon those who would welcome truth to floundering and failing in ignorance. Do not succumb to false notions of tolerance or to fear—fear of inconvenience, disapproval, or even suffering. Remember the Savior’s promise:

Elder Joaquin A Costa

I testify to you that if you pay the price of revelation, humble yourself, read, pray, and repent, the heavens will open and you will know, as I know, that Jesus is the Christ, He is my Savior, and He is yours.

Elder Mark J Palmer

As we learn to see others as the Lord sees them rather than with our own eyes, our love for them will grow and so will our desire to help them. 

No true teaching or learning will ever occur when done in frustration or anger, and hearts will not change where love is not present. 

Love should never be withdrawn when a child, friend, or family member fails to live up to our expectations. 

Because He loves us, the Lord expects much of us.

Next time you are asked to do something hard, think of the Lord beholding you, loving you, and inviting you to let it go and follow Him. And thank Him for loving you enough to invite you to do more. 

Elder Gary E Stevenson

I bear testimony that one of the privileges we enjoy as Latter-day Saints living in the fulness of times is the gift of the Holy Ghost. I know that the Holy Ghost does and will help you. 

Elder Scott Grow

Scripture study becomes the channel for the Spirit to give each of us a customized tutorial. As you study the scriptures each day, alone, and with your family, you will learn to recognize the voice of the Spirit and will come to know God.

After suffering through extensive, debilitating treatments for nearly a year, he (Neal Maxwell- cancer) was totally and completely back “in the game.” He served for seven more years.
As we seek to do God’s will by faithfully serving Him and our fellowmen, we feel His approval and truly come to know Him.

Elder Benjamin De Hoyas

While there are many things we can do to be a light and an ensign to others, I would like to focus on the following three: observing the Sabbath day, hastening the work of salvation on both sides of the veil, and teaching in the Savior’s way. 

As we keep the Sabbath day holy and partake of the sacrament, we are not only cleansed, but our light also grows brighter.

Elder Quentin L Cook

Adversity should not be viewed as either disfavor from the Lord or a withdrawal of His blessings. Opposition in all things is part of the refiner’s fire to prepare us for an eternal celestial destiny.